Cell Phones and Tweens
I know we all made it through the tween and teen years without cell phones, but they sure are a way of life now. My question to you:
Do your kids have cell phones? What age did they get them?
My daughter has a friend who is 9 and she has this cool Firefly Mobile Phone. She can call her Mom, her Dad, and a handful of preprogrammed numbers. Her Mom buys minutes for it ahead of time so she can’t really rack up a huge bill, and the price of the phone is less than $75 so that isn’t too bad either.
So, of course, now my daughter wants one. Being the Mom that I am, I told her no. At this point she is not away from me, other than at school, long enough to warrant one.
But I got to thinking. I could get one Firefly (or other inexpensive pre-paid cell phone) and depending on which child needed it, they could “check” it out from me.
This summer I would like to give my son, who will be 11, more independence. He should be able to ride his bike to his friend’s house (roughly 3/4 mile away on a quiet street) without me going along. I would feel better if he could call me if he ran into a challenge - and I am not giving him my expensive Treo to play with.
So, how does the whole cell phone thing work in your house? Do the kids have their own? What kind and what type of rules do you have set for usage?
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14 opinions for Cell Phones and Tweens
Elizabeth
Mar 21, 2007 at 10:00 am
When we first started, I bought the ugliest regular phone I could find (thus reducing the “show-off” factor), and, added a line for $9.99.
We called it the “extra phone”, and, issued it to my daughter as needed. Everything went fine, she was very responsible, and, has her own now(she’s 12). She doesn’t have any set rules other than don’t use it when you’re at home, but, we just address anything as it comes up.
I’m not wild about the preprogrammed numbers thing because there’s no way to know for sure who they’d need to call. What if mom was out of range, or, dad’s battery died?
I get so mad when the cell phone thing turns into an evaluation of parenting skills (not you, other places).
Yes, even though we didn’t have them, it’s JUST A PHONE(!), and, a child really might have a legitimate need to use one, as they really do go places without you sometimes.
Oops, I guess I need to make my own post sometime, huh? Sorry…
char
Mar 21, 2007 at 10:06 am
Elizabeth - thanks for your input. The ugliest phone concept is a good one. And you make a good point about the preprogrammed numbers, too.
I may get a really cheap prepaid one and see how they do with it this summer and then decide if I want to add one to my plan.
Can’t wait to read your post!
Gina
Mar 21, 2007 at 12:06 pm
Both my kids have cells. The daughter (15) has one for after school and when she’s away from home. The boy (12) has one that he takes to friends houses and if he stays after school for something.
Rules are, if you are home, you have no reason to use the cell. It goes in the drawer or on the counter and you can not use it unless it’s absolutely necessary.
I had a struggle with the girl on this, because all her friends get to take them with them all the time. To bed, use them at will, and so on. I just find that it is not necessary. She’s finally started to listen to me, and realize that she doesn’t need it in her bedroom at night, because getting up at 6am is pretty hard for her.
I do like them having them, just in case.
Gina
Mar 21, 2007 at 12:22 pm
Oh and I wanted to mention that Disney Mobile has a fantastic phone. Not only does it have a tracking system on it, you can allocate how many minutes you want your child’s phone to have.
char
Mar 21, 2007 at 4:23 pm
Gina - I forgot about the Disney one. I’ll have to look into that one too.
Sunshine
Mar 22, 2007 at 5:29 am
Cell phones can be good and bad. I think it depends on the maturity of the child. If they spend a lot of time away from home on their own. After school functions. I noticed some children are always calling their friends, even when they are away from home. Children need to understand that the cell phone is for emergencies, and to keep in touch with the family. My grandson who is 14 understands that keeping up his chores, and keeping his grades up at school rewards more minutes. Works real well for him. On the other hand the 12 year old thinks has no phone because of his attitude. He thinks everything should be given to him even if his grades are bad and he is very head strong. He likes the phone to play games and does not listen to authority. So no phone for him.
Gayla
Mar 26, 2007 at 7:50 am
We have two cell phones in our house. One is mine and the other is for whomever might be going someplace and need to take it with. Most of the time it ends up in my one son’s hands because he’s the most responsible child. I swear the kids is a walking post-it note.
I first got the cell for my kids when they were visiting their dad’s family a lot. That side of their family always runs late and it was just one of those ways I removed myself from stressful situations.
Jo
Mar 26, 2007 at 5:02 pm
I’m a mean mom. Neither my 16yo or 12yo has a cell phone and the only way they will get one is if it is a prepaid phone and they pay for it. Like Gayla, we have two cell phones so if the kids go anywhere they need one then they take one phone and my husband or I carry the other. Personally, I think the whole cell phone thing has gotten WAY out of hand but I’m old fashioned that way. LL.
char
Mar 26, 2007 at 5:14 pm
Jo - I like your style!
Bernadette
Mar 28, 2007 at 1:15 am
I purchased both of my children $20 Virgin Mobile pre-paid cell phones with the understanding that they must buy the minutes themselves (I bought the first 200 minutes($18). After 4 months, neither of them has used the initial allotment. This will be a good test of their ability to not lose the phone, run-up the bill, etc.
char
Mar 28, 2007 at 2:51 am
Bernadette - I think this is the approach I would use. Thanks for letting us know what works for you.
The Dad
Apr 2, 2007 at 1:22 pm
You are not raising kids you are raising young adults. These are the ones that are being targeted by credit card companies, school loans, etc. My kids are now 17 and 19. They have had their cell phones since they were 13. No, I was not excited when my daughter made it clear this was a “must have” item. However, I bought her Virgin Wireless Prepaid (Comes out to $7 to as high as $20 a month). Yeah, I to bought her the cheapest one they make (Kyocera KE433 - available all of the time on Ebay for about $2 plus $4 shipping). Virgin Mobile has a “Vkey” requirement - a password of sorts. I (used to) check the kids use, balance, times of calls. They are on their own now and very good about their use - NO DRIVING ON THE PHONE. I find that the person they call the most is their mom and I. I often times use my (not registered with Virgin Mobile) credit card to throw some extra money on the phones since I appreciate it when they let me know when they have made it to work, school - when in bad traffic, or their friends house to spend the night. Anything but a plan, kids can’t afford it, so why would we encourage something that is not sustainable? When their phones run out of money, they run out of talking. And again, since it costs (them) money, they keep their calls short and don’t spend hours talking while driving. This is turning into a real (dangerous) problem for kids these days.
Tay
Apr 3, 2007 at 5:35 am
I’m a tween and I really want a cell phone. I was just wondering if the cell phones have done more good then bad for your kids.
Babblz.com
Apr 3, 2007 at 9:55 am
Weary Parent: Parenting Tweens & Teens » Cell Phones and Tweens…
When is the right time to buy your kid a cellphone? firefly or pre-paid? Should you even do it at all?…
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